The short answer
Usually with the probate court in the county where your parent lived.
Property in another state, especially land, can need a second, separate case there. Some states limit who may serve from out of state, so check before you apply.
This chapter explains how things usually work in the United States. It is not legal, tax or financial advice, and the rules where you live may differ. Before you act on anything here, check it with one of the people named at the end of the chapter.
What to do
- Confirm the county where your parent lived when they died.
- List any land or buildings your parent owned in other states.
- Ask the probate court in your parent's county whether you can serve from where you live.
- Ask the probate court where each property is whether it needs a second case.
- Write down any deadline the second state gives you.
- Plan which steps need you there in person, and group them into as few trips as you can.
What can wait
- The second state, until the home case is open. Keep its deadlines in view: in Florida, for example, the shorter form has one.
- Deciding what happens to property in the other state.
- A trip for anything a court lets you do by mail, phone or video.
Who can help
The probate court clerk in each county can tell you its forms and steps.
A lawyer licensed in each state where your parent owned property can tell you how the cases fit together.
If the distance makes the job too much, Am I the executor, and do I have to accept? explains how to step aside or share the role.
The rules, phone numbers and web addresses in this book were checked against the agencies’, courts’ and organizations’ own pages in October 2026. Where a rule differs by state, the book names one state as an example. Check anything you rely on with the office itself.
From Book 2: Being in Charge
This page has the short answer and the closing lists from chapter 4. The full chapter explains, in plain words, what exists, what to ask, and who can answer. The book covers months 1 to 9 after the death.
Questions near this one
Other questions on related subjects, from this book and the others.
- Who is in charge if no one was named? Book 1, The First Month
- How do I pay for the funeral? Book 1, The First Month
- Who tells Social Security and the other offices? Book 1, The First Month
- What about half-siblings and step-siblings? Book 5, Siblings and the Estate
Hear when Being in Charge is out
A short note when each book is out. Five or six emails a year at most. You can unsubscribe whenever you like.