The short answer
More than many people think, though the rules depend on the state. In Arizona, for example, the executor has to tell the heirs and beneficiaries about the appointment, list what the estate holds, and account for how it was handled. Other states set their own rules.
You can ask for these things. If the executor won't act, the probate court can be asked to step in. And if you are the executor, sharing papers early can head off much of the anger families describe.
This chapter explains how things usually work in the United States. It is not legal, tax or financial advice, and the rules where you live may differ. Before you act on anything here, check it with one of the people named at the end of the chapter.
What to do
- Ask the executor, in writing, for the notice, the inventory and an expected timeline.
- Ask the probate court clerk whether an estate or a will has been filed, and how to see the file.
- Keep every request and every reply, with the date.
- Send everyone the same papers at the same time, if you are the executor.
- Ask a probate lawyer what your state requires, if nothing comes.
- Leave the court until asking has failed.
What can wait
- The final account. It comes when the estate closes.
- Deciding whether to ask for the executor's removal.
- Reading meaning into a quiet month, while you wait for a reply.
Who can help
The probate court clerk in the county where your parent lived can tell you what has been filed, and how to see it.
A probate lawyer of your own, separate from any lawyer the estate uses, can tell you what you may ask for. You can ask any lawyer whom they represent.
A mediator can help when the talking has stopped. When is a mediator worth it? explains how.
The rules, phone numbers and web addresses in this book were checked against the agencies’, courts’ and organizations’ own pages in October 2026. Where a rule differs by state, the book names one state as an example. Check anything you rely on with the office itself.
From Book 5: Siblings and the Estate
This page has the short answer and the closing lists from chapter 2. The full chapter explains, in plain words, what exists, what to ask, and who can answer. The book covers months 1 to 18 after the death.
Questions near this one
Other questions on related subjects, from this book and the others.
- Who is in charge if no one was named? Book 1, The First Month
- What if I think a sibling took money? Book 5, Siblings and the Estate
- How do I find the will and the papers, and what if I can't? Book 1, The First Month
- What if the will is unequal? Book 5, Siblings and the Estate
Hear when Siblings and the Estate is out
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