The short answer
Sometimes the death shows what a couple had been covering for each other. While both were alive, one parent could fill the other's gaps without anyone else seeing them.
Grief, depression and other treatable problems can also look like memory loss. A doctor can tell them apart. If your parent has Medicare, its yearly Wellness visit includes a check for signs of dementia.
Your parent decides whether to see the doctor, and what to share with you.
This chapter explains how things usually work in the United States. It is not legal, tax or financial advice, and the rules where you live may differ. Before you act on anything here, check it with one of the people named at the end of the chapter.
In the full chapter
The chapter explains what exists and what to ask, then ends with what to do, what can wait so you can set it aside, and who can answer the questions that are yours alone.
The rules, phone numbers and web addresses in this book were checked against the agencies’, courts’ and organizations’ own pages in October 2026. Where a rule differs by state, the book names one state as an example. Check anything you rely on with the office itself.
From Book 6: Your Surviving Parent
This page has the short answer from chapter 5. The full chapter explains, in plain words, what exists, what to ask, and who can answer. The book covers months 3 to 24 after the death.
Questions near this one
Other questions on related subjects, from this book and the others.
- What if one of us cared for Mom or Dad for years? Book 5, Siblings and the Estate
- What if I think a sibling took money? Book 5, Siblings and the Estate
- Is my other parent safe to live alone? Book 6, Your Surviving Parent
- What is different the second time? Book 7, The Second Parent
Hear when Your Surviving Parent is out
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