The short answer
Deal with these before the rest of the house. Medicines and firearms can hurt someone, and each of the four has rules of its own.
The FDA says the best option for unused medicines is a drug take-back site or a prepaid mail-back envelope. Leftover opioids can't be given to anyone else, even a relative.
Firearms follow federal and state transfer rules, and some kinds need ATF's approval before they change hands. Call the car's insurer before anyone drives it. Back up and wipe phones and computers before they leave the family.
This chapter explains how things usually work in the United States. It is not legal, tax or financial advice, and the rules where you live may differ. Before you act on anything here, check it with one of the people named at the end of the chapter.
What to do
- Gather every medicine into one box, and take it to a take-back site or use a mail-back envelope.
- Leave any firearm where it is, and ask the executor and a lawyer before anyone moves it.
- Call the car's insurer before anyone drives it.
- Contact the lender, if there is a car loan, before payments stop.
- Ask the executor before any device is wiped, then save the photos and files and wipe each one.
- Keep your parent's phone line on, if you can, until the accounts are sorted.
- Ask the supplier or a local charity about hearing aids, CPAP machines and other equipment.
What can wait
- Selling the car, until the insurer, any lender and the executor have answered.
- Recycling phones and computers, until everyone who wants photos or files has them.
Who can help
A pharmacy or police station with a take-back site can take the medicines. For firearms, a lawyer who knows firearm law in the state where the house is, and ATF for the federal rules. Your state attorney general can explain the rules on a car loan.
People do not have to be suicidal to call the 988 Lifeline.
The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988, or chat at chat.988lifeline.org. Free, confidential, any hour of any day.
It is also for people worried about a friend or loved one. Text and chat are available in Spanish.
The Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the United States, any hour; free and confidential (message and data rates may apply). Also on WhatsApp and web chat.
The Veterans Crisis Line: dial 988 then press 1, text 838255, or chat online at veteranscrisisline.net. Free, confidential, any hour. It serves veterans, service members, National Guard and Reserve members, and their families and friends; no VA enrollment needed.
The rules, phone numbers and web addresses in this book were checked against the agencies’, courts’ and organizations’ own pages in October 2026. Where a rule differs by state, the book names one state as an example. Check anything you rely on with the office itself.
From Book 4: Their House
This page has the short answer and the closing lists from chapter 10. The full chapter explains, in plain words, what exists, what to ask, and who can answer. The book covers months 3 to 15 after the death.
Questions near this one
Other questions on related subjects, from this book and the others.
- How do I clear a house in stages? Book 4, Their House
- What do I do about the house, pets, car and mail right now? Book 1, The First Month
- What about crypto, online accounts and digital assets? Book 3, Their Money
- How do I find all of their accounts? Book 2, Being in Charge
Hear when Their House is out
A short note when each book is out. Five or six emails a year at most. You can unsubscribe whenever you like.